#WeTwo: When with one of the women, his gaze would invariably drop to our bosom…

Create awareness that non-verbal behaviours like staring can be as uncomfortable and damaging as verbal remarks or physical contact, says Turmeric Consulting’s Roopa Badrinath

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New Delhi: The fourth submission in the #WeTwo series for equal workplaces is also from a media company. It spotlights what experts say is a universal problem:

"There was a young man who joined our team of mostly women in a media company. The team was small and the eldest amongst us was only 32. He was enthusiastic and got along well with everyone. But when in conversation with one of the women individually, his gaze would invariably drop to our bosom repeatedly. We girls had a chat about it amongst ourselves. One of us then decided to explain to him nicely that this was inappropriate and was making us uncomfortable. His behaviour changed for the better. We later came to know through PR professionals we interact with regularly that while his habit had changed with us, it hadn’t in external interactions."

Roopa Badrinath, Founder and Principal Consultant, Turmeric Consulting, reflects on the submission and takeaways for workplaces. 

Complaints on men staring at women in public places to the point of making them uncomfortable are common. How does one deal with it at work?

Roopa Badrinath: Addressing inappropriate behaviour including staring in the workplace is important to ensure a safe and respectful work environment. If a colleague’s gaze is making others uncomfortable, it is essential to address it early. Open, direct communication, as seen in this case, can often be effective, especially when handled tactfully.  By speaking to the new team member about his behaviour which was causing discomfort to the women on the team, they created an opportunity for awareness and correction without escalation. Most importantly, organisations should foster a culture where respectful behaviour is the norm and create channels where concerns like these can be raised without fear of retaliation.  Defining what constitutes inappropriate behaviour can go a long way in proactively addressing the occurrence of such situations.

Even "good touch" and "bad touch" are contested and end up becoming "He said" vs "She said". In such a scenario, how does one distinguish a good gaze from a bad gaze?

Roopa Badrinath: I would focus on the ‘impact’ as against the ‘intent’. What impact is a particular kind of gaze creating? Is it making people uncomfortable? A gaze becomes problematic when it crosses into the realm of objectification, makes people uncomfortable or feels intrusive or prolonged in a way that signals disrespect or unwanted attention.

When there is an element of ambiguity, it is best to see if  a ‘reasonable person’  in the same situation would feel uncomfortable or harassed by such behaviour. Encouraging employees to trust their instincts and feelings of discomfort is crucial. Adequate training can play a vital role in helping employees navigate these subtleties.

Can and should organisations attempt to proactively deal with education in this space?

Roopa Badrinath: It is an emphatic ‘Yes’! Organisations have to proactively address any form of inappropriate behaviours by empowering employees with awareness and knowledge about what constitutes inappropriate behaviour.  It is important for organisations to also focus on non-verbal behaviours like body language, gestures and gaze so that everybody is aware that non-verbal behaviours like staring can be as uncomfortable and damaging as verbal remarks or physical contact.

What corrective measures should the organisation in question take up?

Roopa Badrinath: In this particular case, the organisation could implement a few corrective measures:

  • Reinforce Workplace Policies: The company should reiterate its sexual harassment policies and code of conduct to all employees and include external interactions as part of those policies.

  • Provide Ongoing Training: Offering training sessions focused on respectful communication and non-verbal behaviours can help reduce similar incidents in the future.

  • Encourage Upstander intervention: The company should promote Upstander intervention, making it clear that anyone who witnesses inappropriate behaviour can and should report it without fear of reprisal.

  • Monitor External Interactions: Given that this behaviour persisted in external dealings, the organisation should ensure that interactions with clients and external partners adhere to the same standards of professionalism expected within the company. Any complaints from external parties should be taken seriously and investigated accordingly.

Anything else you may wish to add?

Roopa Badrinath: This case highlights the importance of creating an inclusive workplace culture where every employee feels respected by colleagues. It also emphasises the role of upstanders in maintaining a respectful environment. Organisations must foster a culture of accountability and ensure that sexual harassment policies are enforced consistently, not only within teams but across all interactions, including those with clients and partners.

Also Read: 

#WeTwo: 'He was way senior. I was silenced. He is still there.'

#WeTwo: “These are opportunities to uphold positive culture, compassion and moral intelligence”

#WeTwo: My boss asked me if I would be comfortable sharing his room…In the second 

#WeTwo: Asking a subordinate to share a room is misuse of power dynamics

#WeTwo: Our boss was a flirt… but almost all the women seemed to play along.

Have an experience to share? Let’s speak up together for equal workplaces. Write to: wetwo@bestmediainfo.com. Confidentiality assured. Click on the links above to learn more about #WeTwo and how it intends to empower equal workplaces. 

Gender-Equality Index sexual harassment
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